My Condition: Not stable at ALL!
In my mind: Im dying
sorry..dah lame giler ku xupdated blog.
i tnk i have no time to do such thing. im completely lost ..ive lost my strength to move on my life. im sick of myself. kept pretend that im happy.kept ketawa, gelak bagai bagai..but im not.this is the hardest time ever i had faced since the last : my dad passed away. i dont noe how to control the situation.im completely blurred. im devastated. n im no longer myself.
I felt alone..no ones who accompany me, no more brighting star, no more moon light and no more sunshine.just gloomy dark tat covers all my empty spaces. Its really hurt inside. gosh..i dont even heard my heart pumping. im a death body with an empty soul. with nothing with me.
she is tired of me, off course!no one who can stand by me..no one can tahan wif me.cos im different, cos im a burden to everyone..cos im the weak one n off course becos im no more attractive in her eyes. is ok anuar. u will get use to tis situation. u will always.
Tiz is my first time i cried for a relationship.before tis,i just pretend-to-cry cos i tot tat im sad, but im not.serve me right! i cried a lot for tis relationship. a lot of tears.
i dont want to write stuff like tis in my blog,but somehow i tink i shud. no one will persuade me now, even my heart hurts so much i have to stand it alone.i have no idea that it will took all my life n soul just to have tis relationship.i have no idea that the happiness will turn sorrow..
n if u read tiz..pls.do nothing.just ignore wat the crap ive wrote here.i love you..n i will always. cos u r the bestest thing happened in my life. i will not forget u..n the good thing u have done to me.
its complety different air here,i will get use.dont worry about me. cos i noe i can handle it.n pls!dont be tat nice to me anymore.dont lie to urself.just stop loving me cos i noe u r not.its hard for me but i will get over it.
Thanx to you sunshine, just go on wif somebody else tat u might thing attractive n suit wif u. i will not get mad. i will always pray for u. thanx for being such a gud accompanier for me.
i love u..dont worry.i will not find other girl cos i have no more heart to give to others, because i already gave it to u..n unlucky for me..u broke it